this is your baptism

but

of course

some days i just
lie around
and

hardly exist
and can't tell apart
what i'm eating

from

my hand or

my wrist.

'cause flesh
is flesh,
flesh as flesh

as flesh,
the difference is thin.
but life
has a certain ability
of breathing new life
into me,
so i

breathe it in

and
the question is
was i more alive
than i am
now

i happily

have to disagree
i laugh

more often now

i cry
more often

now

i am more me